It is truly hard to be alone in such a high paced society. We have Facebook to show people how socially active we wish we were. We have Instagram to show our friends how terribly exiting the sky, our cat, and our lunch can be.
But, then again... It isn't that hard to feel alone after all, is it? We often feel that not many people can identify with some situations that we go through. As Christians, this is magnified to many more areas in life. Those of you that take a look around, and have been in the fight a long enough time, can definitely identify. Moments when all your "friends" are unreachable, and unfavorable.
I looked at a photo album the other day of my elementary years. It was staggering to see how much background I knew about 90% of those people then, and how 80% of them I don't talk to anymore. They don't come to church. I don't see them. We don't talk. We are just not friends anymore, and that is a sucky thing to say when you remember how close you were.
Human relations is something humans naturally desire. To socialize, laugh, cry and relate with other beings in our world. However, being a Christian commonly means doing things on your own. Holding on to convictions is hard, and our level of holiness very commonly reflects the amount of loneliness we can endure.
I am not only talking about having no friends, but I am talking about doing things alone. Having convictions that your friends don't have, and sticking by them. I recall times feeling so out of place because of things I wasn't doing, that I really questioned if these convictions were worth it.
Talk about questioning my loyalty to holiness! Was it worth it? Maybe it wasn't...
Maybe I should convince someone that making a life choice is the right thing, so they can live it with me? Maybe this wasn't God's will because this test was straining?
Not really. God calls holiness out of us regardless of the people around us.
When all those old friends seem to be making lefts and rights on that narrow path, it is so easy to get your directions mixed up. Believe me.
And in those times when I felt the most alone, I knew God was doing two things for me. #1 He was forcing me to realize the need of my dependence on him beyond just a spiritual authority. Now Jesus was not just my Lord, teacher and savior, but my friend as well. Because I felt could not relate/vent/talk to anyone how I felt, only God was left to relate to. #2 It was preparing me for a time in my future walk with Christ that I would be alone; God was showing me how to deal with loneliness because it is something I will encounter again. Whether in a social setting, in a decision, or any other scenario, I will feel utterly alone. It's kind of a scary thought, but if the end is a better relationship with Christ, then bring it on. Right?
Psalm 23:4
Yea, though I (singular) walk through the valley of the shadow of death,I will fear no evil; For You are with me;Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.
-Jerry
I know what you mean...I've felt so alone in so many instances of my life. However, I seem to feel God's presence so much more during that time! It almost feels as if someone really is there with me when I feel so terribly lonely. It's been a real challenge, but a blessing, to realize that God is showing me that the Christian life isn't just about socialism and fellowship, but about letting go of all that brings joy & pleasure and really focus on giving my all to Him- whether with others or not. Thanks for the reminder!
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